In Too Deep: Size Matters

So. Its been forevs since an 'In To Deep' has graced your expensive wanky Macbook screens. So I decided to go out on an abstract limb and produce one about size. Size isnt a place or a thing or a size.. its an attitude, and as you will learn it comes in many forms. The scale i'm using to judge these size related hilarities is "inches". As i see it fits. And I like making cock references. The more inches it gets the more it deserves to be on this site as a size related thing.

Exhibit A: Novelty Over Size iPhone.



Yes. A rare breed indeed. These macro iPhones were developed by the corrupt Chinese government to attract babes through tourism, then to rip them off when they pay 20c for a photo and then learn it is infact not a real iPhone. I was pretty excited it was 20 degrees in Tokyo when I saw this bad boy hangin' out at the mall. He kindly let me take a photo with him (must be a hard life as a celebradyke [especially one with celebraAIDS]).

Inches : 6"


Exhibit B: Paris Hugeton.



If you haven't heard already you're probs a lesbian or live in a third world country that doesnt even have novelty over sized iPhones yet (pssh lames). PH her-hot-self has coined a new phrase. Coined here means took an exsisting word, made it sassy-sexy-cool and now all of teen-hollywood jiz all over it. Its 'Huge'. As in "Huge" is the new "Hot". So now all you have to do is call people huge and your an instant babe. One word of advice though, steer clear of refering to your token fat friend in such a manner. Shes vulerable right now.. as I raped her.

Inches: 17 1/2"

Exhibit C: Refer to Exhibit D

Exhibit D: Micro Dolphin Breeding.


Yums. Have you ever wanted to take a dolphin, make it mini, dep fry it and brand it as a packet of chips?! OMG right, me too. So now its reals. I have decided to forget about modeling and go for my dream of becoming a Micro-Doplh breeder! In stores soons.

Inches: Babe"