In Too Deep: V-Hudge Career Moves.

Vanessa Hudgens is the hottest and tightest piece of arse getting around right now. Forget our past scanda-whores divas Britney, Paris and Mel Gibson. It's all about the V-Hudge! She's hanging around now like a sticky piece of shit on your toilet bowl, no matter how many times you flush, it's still there. This bitch is popular and will keep getting paid..... most likely in digital camera memory cards. Due to her history in 'flash' photography this segment will be rated in 'flashies'.

*'Flash' photography meaning getting naked not artifically lit photography.


Exhibit A: Film-Thirteen
Flashies: 5.7

Thirteen was infact Vanessa's debut film....not bad for someone who moved onto the faggy pseudo-musical series that is High School Musical. I love musicals and this was the only one I couldn't bare to watch. Absolute filth, Judy Garland must be turning in her grave. Well its either about that or she realised Liza Minelli was actually her genetic daughter. Vanessa played Noel who was Tracey's(Evan Rachel Wood) best friend from across the street...before she became a tramp.




Exhibit B: Solo music
Flashies: 9 and ¾

Vanessa always makes sound decisions when it comes to her career. Especially when it involves fluro sneakers. Yay shameless plug for Ecko. I love when songs are written for products. Like 'Ring of Fire' for the popular hemorrhoid-relief commercial. Example in video form below.



'Basically what we gonna do is dance"....wise gurl.



Exhibit See: Rock, paper, scissor tournaments
Flashies: 33

Alright so they have rock, paper, scissor tournaments on Disney now, between the notorious 'good-but-bad' girls Vanessa and Miley. If only this was a contact sport and Vanessa jammed her arm down Miley's throat removing her larynx and feeding it to Pluto as an afternoon snack. If you can't be bothered watching all the video it's cool Vanessa wins. Zac mentioned that she had pretty quick hands. Youse kuntz don't even know.





Exhibit D: Nudie shots
Flashies: 169.99

All things considered, another nude photo scandal is probably a hell of a lot better for her career than starring in her new film 'Bandslam.' Seriously, if diarrhea could be transposed into film reel, they’d call it 'Bandslam.' I think it’s safe to say that we’d all rather see her barely legal boobies than that piece of shit.



She really should be taking this guys advice.